West Ham 1 Brighton 1
It's to the Best Meze Cafe for festive egg, chips and beans, and to meet Nigel in West Ham Christmas jumper and Matt in yellow hoodie — he must still be looking for the right Dinos Mavropanos replica shirt.
Nigel has been to see some bloke called Paul McCartney and Matt asks if his back catalogue is any good. Matt has returned from Spain where Lisa has insisted he watch tippy-tappy football at Bilbao, Real Sociedad and some Sunday League team on Astroturf. He's now completely relaxed after his break and prepared to back referees at all times. I've returned from a mini-break in Cheltenham and a tour of Gustav Holst's gaff, hoping that West Ham are not suitable material for Holst's Christmas carol In the Bleak Midwinter.
We head to the London Stadium to meet Michael, clad in an almost Christmas West Ham jumper and declaring that West Ham is humbug, plus Gavin, wearing a Kraftwerk t-shirt in an attempt to make Niclas Fullkrug feel he's on the Autobahn to Wembley. On the pitch the club puts on a moving tribute to 15-year-old keeper Oscar Fairs with a minute's applause for the Hammer taken far too young. With the death of Lopetegui's father and Antonio's car crash it's been a sad month for WHU.
Then the football starts and not much happens in the first half. Bowen beats Estupinan for speed and shoots against Verbruggen's legs, while Fabianski reacts smartly to save from Mitoma's volley. Bowen then has a shot across goal deflected just wide by Dunk. But it's a scrappy game with passes going astray on all sides and Fullkrug not getting much service up front and never really getting into the game. He clearly needs more game time after three months out.The ref and linos makes some odd decisions and Matt's Zen-like calm lasts all of 20 minutes.
At half time our routine is disrupted by the revelation that Nigel has had problems sourcing his lucky banana and has instead arrived with a lucky satsuma, possibly signed from Sevilla. Today oranges really are the only fruit.
West Ham start the second half slowly and Brighton take the lead after 51 minutes. Estupinan's cross sees Fabianski all alone challenging Dunk and the Brighton man's knock back is stroked home by Wieffer. Crucially we insist that Nigel now eats his lucky satsuma. Loppy takes off Fullkrug for Summerville and moves Bowen down the middle.
SITTING DOWN ON THE JOB
A minute later West Ham equalise. Soucek plays a first-time ball though to Bowen who runs at his two defenders, fires a shot which Verbruggen parries and as the ball arcs up into the air Mo Kudus does really well to react and head home. Mo then grabs a hand-carved Ghanian wooden stool for his sit-down celebration. Was this the elephant in the room?
West Ham have a good spell as Summerville makes a fine run into the area only to shoot against a defender's legs and Alvarez has a shot that extends Verbruggen. But Brighton should really win it at the end. Loppy makes the rather strange decision to move to a back five with young Ollie Scarles at left back. He's exposed a bit by Minteh, who gets through to shoot across goal towards Mitoma who hits the post.
Nigel channels his inner Sam Allardyce, urging WHU to respect the point against out bogey team. Estupinan is lucky to stay on the pitch for an over-the-top lunge on Kilman, while another fluid Brighton move sees Ferguson set up Ayari, whose shot is well-saved by Fabianski. At the end of added time Wan-Bissaka has to make a brave clearing header from under the bar to keep it 1-1.
So it's a point each and to be positive the Hammers are unbeaten for three matches, though the side still seems to lack identity and the build-up is far too slow. We trudge off to the Eagle where Sinead is planning a trip to Ireland and has Fraser's Christmas jumper for Matt, plus bottles of IPA, Corona and Guinness. Jesus and Gabriel have scored for Arsenal on the TV. Nigel starts to reminisce about Nazareth hits and Matt is strangely moved by Michael's news that Mike Nolan of Bucks Fizz is playing panto in Braintree. More drinks, please.
So it's a team at the bottom of the league with a new manager coming up on Boxing Day. What could possibly go wrong? Merry Christmas one and all!
PLAYER RATINGS: Fabianski 6; Wan-Bissaka 7, Kilman 7, Mavropanos 6 (Todibo 6), Emerson 5 (Coufal 6); Soucek 6, Alvarez 5 (Rodriguez n/a), Paqueta 5 (Scarles 5); Bowen 7, Kudus 7, Fullkrug 5 (Summerville 6).