Hard men, bruisers, headcases, brawlers, nutters, call them what you will football has had plenty of them down the years.
Aston Villa, not so much. Certainly not in the demise and rise of the past 10 years. We've still come up with a list of Villa players we wouldn't want to face in a dark alley.
Some of in for their blood and thunder commitment, some for their physical menace, others because they look a bit scary.
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John Carew
The clue's in the chant. 'He's bigger than me and you'. Granted, it's a very playground way of looking at it, but seriously, would you risk getting into a scrap with Big John in the Rocket Club queue. He's actually a gentle giant, but many a former Villa team-mate will tell tales of how he used to absolutely bully his own pals - defenders of the size of Richard Dunne and James Collins - on the Bodymoor Heath practice pitches. And since hanging up his boots he's fancied himself as a hardman actor, the Norwegian Vinny Jones if you like, in a series of movies. He was dangerous with corner flags too!
Mile Jedinak
Okay so maybe it's just the beard. Yep, the Beard to be Feared. Nah, it's more than that. Even that Australian bush of a beard isn't big enough to hide that steely glare. You know, the one he fixed the away fans at The Hawthorns with when he dispatched his penalty in the play-off semi final shoot-out. Jedinak was a warrior on the field too, trying to eek every last drop of energy out of his body even in the winter of his career as a Villa player. We're not sure that that death-stare can be taught.
Dion Dublin
It is important to note that in no way whatsoever is dropping the nut on Robbie Savage to be condoned... No it’s not, really. Dublin did just that, reinforcing his hard men credentials during Blues’ victory over Villa during a poisonous derby at Villa Park in March 2003. In Dublin’s mitigation, the big striker might simply have been exercising his neck muscles after making a full return to football from a broken neck in 2000. He came within millimetres of ending up in a wheelchair when he cracked bones in his vertebrae in a clash with the Sheffield Wednesday substitute Gerald Sibon.
Shaun Teale
The man of steel was so hard that he played for Villa at Wembley with a broken nose. In fact the defender who lined up alongside Paul McGrath had four hernia operations, broke his nose twice, snapped his medial ligaments, suffered a depressed cheekbone, a jaw fracture and damage close to his right eye. It’s easy to confuse hardmen with players who are dirty.
But Teale was hard and clean, he rarely mis-timed tackles (okay, so we acknowledge that that is a photo of him getting sent off, yes) and opposing players felt the full wrath of his challenge if they weren’t quick enough. He was as solid as can be, but so was his centre-half partner as he recalls: “McGrath was a very tough lad. I don’t think people realised how hard he could be if riled.”
Andy Lochhead
Throwing that famous thinning head in where others would fear to tread, Andrew Lorimar Lochhead was able to baldly and boldly go into Villa folklore. The kind of guy who would attempt to nod a medicine ball in to the top corner from 40 yards if you asked him, the Scottish striker was more fearless than out-and-out hard. Lochhead scored 44 goals in 154 appearances, including 25 overall in 1971-72 as Villa reached the League Cup final and won the Third Division title, but it was at Burnley where he achieved legendary status.
Throwing that famous thinning head in where others would fear to tread, Andrew Lorimar Lochhead was able to baldly and boldy go into Villa folklore. The kind of guy who would attempt to nod a medicine ball in to the top corner from 40 yards if you asked him, the Scottish striker was more fearless than out-and-out hard. Lochhead scored 44 goals in 154 appearances, including 25 overall in 1971-72 as Villa reached the League Cup final and won the Third Division title, but it was at Burnley where he achieved legendary status.
Allan Evans
Named in the Top 10 of Villa’s all-time greatest players. Evans was a solid and consistent defender who arrived at Villa Park as a forward and got his fair share of goals during his time at the club. The European Cup winner was a fine tackler and a commanding header of the ball. As well as going to extreme levels to keep out forwards, he also bullied defenders to boost his goal tally. Evans was a pivotal stopper who crunched into tackles and left no prisoners. He was rarely overawed.
Bruce Rioch
He may be a gentlemen off the pitch, but on it you wouldn’t mess with him. A sensational footballer with silky skills and a ferocious left foot. He used to dish out the dirt, too. The son of a Scottish Regimental Sergeant Major moved to Villa in 1969 a £100k and quickly repaid his bumper transfer fee. He was a gritty player with a tough tackle and an eye for goal.
George Curtis
He was so hard, he once played with a broken skull, apparently. Not by pretending to be some kind of footballing Hamlet having a kick around with poor Yorrick. But with his own skull. He stayed on the field despite the serious head injury, according to former team-mate Charlie Aitken, who himself knew how to get stuck in.
Known as the Iron Man, Curtis, a formidable defender, was very much of the ‘Thou shalt not pass’ variety, doing his utmost to stop opponents getting near Villa’s goal, even if it meant sometimes kicking the ball as well as the man. He only played 58 times for Villa between 1969 and 1972 and was more famous for his Coventry connections where he made almost 500 appearances and was joint manager for the Sky Blues’ finest hour, their 1987 FA Cup triumph.
It's typical that the only archive pic we can find of him is a friendly shot of him smiling sweetly while some nice kids clean his car!
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The others
We like to make these things democratic so we asked Villa fans what they thought of hard men, before the current Villa era.
Here's a selection of the responses from Villa fans:
crowiejnr: Hard men in terms of just getting on with it, keeping quiet, no fuss but a bit of an edge? etc. McCann, Herd & Baker.
David Summers: I’d put McGinn in there too. As he’s the closest I’ve seen to Alex Cropley
Adz: Jedinak. Mellberg. Villa have lacked real hard men over the last few years. Tough footballers. Tough men. That death stare. Action not words. Jedinak and Mellberg had it. Can’t think of many others.
Patrick Murphy : McGinn is tough as rocks.
Ian Woodcock: I would imagine quite a few Premier League players didn't back themselves in 50-50s with Ron Vlaar.
George: Freddie Bouma. I remember he took a properly hit free kick direct in the face and he just shook it off and got up
Ben Hackeson: I'm surprised no-one has mentioned Ciaran Clark. Jedinak and Terry are the obvious recent ones. McCann, Benteke, Reo-Coker.
George: Freddie Bouma. I remember he took a properly hit free kick direct in the face and he just shook it off and got up
Silver Fox: The last time where we had players who could handle themselves was probably the Shaun Teale/Kevin Richardson/Paul McGrath side (although God was so good he just used his ability).
Stephon Phillip: Anyone remember Shaun Teale telling everyone Vinnis Jones wasn’t a hard man, just before we played Wimbledon? Can’t remember how the game went, but that took some guts.
Rachel Malloch: Alan Hutton.
Ellis Dennant: Put it this way, if I got in a fight I’d want John Terry, Mile Jedinak, Richard Dunne and James Collins on my side
Matt AVFC: None really. Jedinak was pretty intimidating, Hutton kicked Berahino in the balls. Part of the problem for the past 10-15 years. We've missed a proper midfield enforcer since Boateng and our defenders have never really come across like the mad ******** you sometimes need.
Author's footnote: Never played for the Villa but former assistant manager Roy Keane has always scared the **** out of me, so there you go.