ARSENAL SUFFOCATE ANOTHER TEAM AND CHALK UP BLOCK 4 WIN NUMBER 3
If you’re expecting to come here and read me grovel for your forgiveness because Mr Gyokeres played well… you’d be spot on, my friends.
The Swede only managed 45 minutes because he felt something before halftime, but my word, it was his best performance of the season by a very wide margin. He used his strength well, he hustled the same as usual… but I don’t care about that. It’s par for the course of a top striker, and if we’re all very honest here, the only reason people keep talking about the running has been because everything else about his game has been dreadful.
Up until yesterday… my word.
Where the hell did all that beautiful football come from? Did Harry Kane give him a FaceTime mentor session? Electric football. His control was really good, his decisions were great, and he actually created some sexy chances for other players… something we’ve barely seen all season. The pass he made to Trossard (for the mood of the blog, we’ll pretend he was the target) was exceptional in its length and ambition. It gave the Belgian time to pick out Declan, who was galloping into the box so he could drop a BULLET header past Dubravka. An incredible moment and a very Arsenal goal (in open play).
Let’s not forget about the goal as well. Another perfect set piece corner, Big Gabi knocked the ball back into the mixer, BANG, there was Big Vik with the bullet header from 0.5 yards out. The goal was uglier than stealing from a church tithe box… but my word, those are the goals Arsenal just haven’t scored over the past three years.
We have to resist the urge to say, well, it was just Burnley. They’re a well-coached side, they’d only given up two goals at home all season, and Scott Parker is a really good coach. Arsenal just made them look very ordinary. It was another afternoon of suffocating control. I keep talking about Fear Factor™, but I think we’re more draining than that. Arsenal give other teams Dread Factor®. Players know we’re coming to town and they’re going to have to spend a week in the video room analysing 400 moves. They know they’ll have to play a new shape because we’re too dangerous. And they know our team of brutish athletes is going to run them ragged for 94 minutes. We’re draining like off-white office paint from the 90s against the backdrop of white noise. We’re someone humming along to Lana Del Rey on a long car ride. We are your dad still complaining about playing it out the back in 2025. Arsenal are extreme fatigue. It. Is. Glorious.
We gave up zero shots on target, again. The defending is just incredible. Burnley have scored in nine of their last ten games and they couldn’t force a save for an entire 90 minutes. We’re locked down, Arsenal are so good at defending, a shot on target would feel like a dagger to the heart. That’s elite coaching, but it’s also a testament to the mental strength of the entire squad. Defending is a joint effort; it requires all 11 players to focus like they’ve snorted Ritalin for the whole game… and did that against Burnley, a team lesser clubs might have taken the foot off the gas against. We’ve only conceded three goals in ten games and we’ve played City, United, Liverpool, and Newcastle. Some achievement right there. We’ve now matched George Graham’s record of 7 successive wins without conceding, a record that was broken when I was 3 years old. We are witnessing something new here, the culmination of 6 years of hard work and 4 years of extreme consistency.
You know what else? Arteta has certainly got the memo with regards to load management and listening to the players. We’re not seeing dead bodies on the pitch or crazy risks in the League Cup. Arteta looked at what Slot did last year and he’s adjusting with his game day plans and how he structures training. We’re also not making a fuss around referees in the media or on the pitch. We know PGMOL is a petty org, and the lack of fuss seems to have served a purpose. We haven’t been fucked over many times this season, and the marginal calls haven’t often gone against us. Then the final point: Lady Luck might not be on our side, but she’s certainly not working against us. How many times last season would we watch Arsenal concede two shots on target and be a goal down? Too many times. Teams aren’t getting lucky against us this year, so far…
Attacking-wise, we’ve come in for some criticism for no real reason other than being Arsenal. Today was a real eye test game, yes, we scored from a set piece, but there was some really great open play attacking football. We moved the ball at speed for the counterattack goal, but we have so many different varieties of moves for the 12 shots we created. The score should have been higher, Bukayo Saka guilty of missing two really big chances he’d normally finish.
The only negatives of the outing were that Zubi and Gyokeres both exited the field of play with injuries. We just have to hope that we’re not once again in a situation where we’re losing key players as their rotation options come back to full fitness. Kai needs to come back and rotate with Gyokeres, not be forced into the starting 11 to play 15 games straight. Let’s see how that works out, Gyokeres at least sat on the bench for the second half.
So, we’re seven points clear as it stands. Unai Emery and Emi Martinez did us no favours against Liverpool. The Spanish coach decided to 4D chess Arne Slot by playing the exact way he likes… and ignoring how everyone else has smashed them of late. I have higher hopes for Bournemouth, who take on City tomorrow. Reality is, in this league, you can’t expect your biggest rivals to lose all the time, but it would be nice if one of them lost this weekend.
Spurs dropped a howler against Chelsea, losing 1-0, but creating next to nothing over 90 minutes. Djed Spence and VDV both purposefully ignored the handshake of Thomas Frank when exiting the pitch, deeply disrespectful stuff from a couple of players that took the club to 17th last season. But, more broadly, I’m losing my mind reading Spurs fans genuinely calling for the head of Thomas Frank. Like, what is going on? Spurs are 4th, eight points off the top of the league, and… they want Thomas Frank gone? Fans inside the stadium hate him? What? I really just can’t with some fans in the Premier League. More addicted to the drama and likes than what’s best for their club. Similar stuff at United, they were going 2nd for a moment today, they ended up drawing, and some of the vitriol would have you believing they are 19th again.
Still, can’t say we won’t be seeing the same if we drop points to Sunderland next weekend. After the Liverpool game, some fans were genuinely throwing in the towel on the season saying Arteta couldn’t do it this year. He hasn’t done anything yet, but those sorts of takes are ageing disgracefully.
Oh, like my Gyokeres comments? Sure. I’ll take that. Let’s see if he can do things like he did at the weekend consistently against smaller teams and all season long. Then I’ll eat my dry humble pie.
Ok, that’s me done. A good weekend, I’m feeling sexy, you should be too. Let’s all put on our Cherries scarf and sing whatever songs they sing. Or something like that. Have a VERY good morning, you deserve it. x
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Podcast## ON THE WHISTLE | BURNLEY (A) | EARLY BIRD
Pedro
·
Nov 1
ON THE WHISTLE | BURNLEY (A) | EARLY BIRD
The boys dive into the brilliant Burnley result that’s set Arsenal up for a very good weekend — no matter what happens elsewhere.
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