West Ham United star Tomáš Souček has opened up about his struggles with insomnia.
The Czech Republic international has shared aspects of his autobiography, titled _Suk,_ with the Czech media.
As explained by [iDnez](https://www.idnes.cz/fotbal/reprezentace/tomas-soucek-autobiografie-kniha-suk.A251108_102306_ms-fotbal_dc), the midfielder wrote the book with help from David Čermák and Jan Palička, editors at MF Dnes and Seznam Zprávy respectively.
The West Ham player detailed his battles with insomnia and depression over the past two years.
Souček admits he wasn’t comfortable sharing his problems initially, even with loved ones.
Insomnia started impacting him so much that the 30-year-old considered ending his playing career. He’d be entering the pitch feeling half asleep.
_“And especially the sleep! I didn’t know where to go anymore. Two years of horror,”_ he said.
_“I was ashamed to talk about it for a long time. Even my parents, before I decided to write my confession, had no idea that anything bad was happening. Something that bothered me so much that I thought about ending my career. Insomnia. Depression. Fear of the future.”_
West Ham star: “I don’t understand in retrospect”
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The midfielder says that over the years, he’s repeatedly stayed on the pitch when it was physically painful for him. With, insomnia, it started to have adverse effects gradually.
_“You don’t believe it, do you? I don’t really understand it in retrospect either. Where others won’t stick their foot because they’re scared of the pain. Jump in with my head. I can’t count the scars on my body. I finish matches even with my head bandaged, but this hurt my soul,”_ Souček explained.
_“At first it was only slightly annoying, but after a few months it became unbearable. I was at the bottom. I ran into every match without sleep. Every match! Can you imagine? I was afraid of failure, I was afraid of reactions, afraid of everything.”_
The Czech explained he tried various methods to try and find a solution on his own. At times that made it worse, and then he finally decided to seek help from experts.
_“Do you understand that no one recognised anything about me? Professional footballers are like under a microscope, everything is measured, checked, we are constantly on machines. Nothing special was found with me! And yet I was ripe for a psychiatrist. In the end, I ended up with the doctors too, because I couldn’t handle the problem on my own. I needed help,”_ he added.
The West Ham player went on to explain he’s now got things much more under control.