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BRUTAL ARSENAL SET NEW TONE WITH BATTERING OF LEEDS

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Arsenal are some team, right? I know, I know, this time last week we were calling hotlines asking them how to handle that United result, but this week was some comeback. Arteta’s presser, the battering of Kairat, then rolling out this weekend against a tough Leeds team, beating them every which way with 4 goals and a clean sheet.

The boys chalked off game 15 of the countdown with a win. That was a moment of importance. Not just a win, a message to the league, the fans, the doubters, the class of 92 rage baiters. We’re only leaving London 3 more times this season in the Premier League. Our goal difference is now +29 and the best in the league. Our defence is the stingiest by 4 goals this season. For all the loud-mouthed whining about not scoring the types of goals people want to see, we are now 1 goal behind Manchester City in totality.

‘But, but, but I don’t like the goals’ grow up.

Our squad is basically fully fit and the bench is monstrous. You want to talk about character, let’s talk about losing our best player in the warm-up to a hip injury, and the much-maligned replacement, Madueke, coming in with two assists and a stellar performance. Those are the micro hero moments that win you Premier League titles.

What about comeback stories? We have three. They’re all forwards. Kai Havertz started his second game of the week, dropping into midfield, playing a more advanced role that sometimes looked like he was an auxiliary striker. He was brilliant. Viktor Gyokeres, who likes playing against Leeds, once again turned up to a stadium and looked busy. I said it in the week, I don’t care about misses, because good strikers are volume players. Gyokeres got in behind the Leeds defence when he was found early and fluffed his lines. Then he did the sort of thing we want from a battering ram: shinned a brilliant Martinelli cross in from 5 yards, whilst a Leeds defender hung from his waist. If he collapses in a heap, he doesn’t get the penalty. If he misses, he doesn’t get the penalty. If he scores, he’s a hero. He chose well.

The victim phase of Gyokeres has been boring. I don’t care about feelings, I don’t care about sad stories of living alone, I want my strikers to sleep on slate beds, watch Ian Wright Youtube compilations on repeat, and show up possessed. Gyokeres, scoring that goal, celebrating with a Bane mask so dramatic a theatre kid would have been proud, showed he’s stopped being a beta, and he’s finally accepted that if he doesn’t fight back, the Premier League will claim him as a victim.

Proper athletes don’t want your sympathy, they want your adulation. This week looks like we’re seeing a different Gyokeres. Will it ever reach the heights we dreamt of in the summer? Doubtful. But to win this Premier League, we probably need 5 more games like that where he’s a difference-maker. Great job from the big man, really great.

Gabi Jesus, shunned after one rubbish performance? Held to a different standard because he’s old news to Arteta? Disgusting. But, again, do great strikers cry about it? Ask fan accounts to tweet ‘what would HR say about this injustice’ or do they just get on with it and do bad stuff to teams like Leeds? Jesus received the ball in the box, twisted and turned, cut half a yard, and curled his shot across goal.

That’s big man stuff. That’s what he did for City down the stretch. That’s Premier League winner contributions.

Zubimendi dropped back into monster form. He was a controller once again in the midfield. But what do great players do when they sin against the Arsenal faithful with sloppy passes? They show up in the box with world-class headers to open the scoring on BIG away days.

Arsenal aren’t reading the slander about being too reliant on set-pieces. If someone said they don’t like Mike Tyson because he knocks too many people out with uppercuts, do you think he’d change it up to appease the bores? Did Lewis Hamilton stop driving aggressively because the purists cried? Did Tiger Woods stop ripping the ball because he overpowered courses in his prime? No, these crybabies who whine about our dominance at set-pieces make so much noise because it’s a team tool that isn’t an aberration, it’s a carefully crafted skill set very few can get near. If we win the league doing this, who gives a rat’s arse? I’m going to get SETPIECE FC tattooed on my forehead to make the point.

But if you’re looking at Arsenal, thinking we’re just about one thing, you’re watching the wrong game. You’re not reading what the best coaches in the world are saying about us. You are not succumbing to the ugly beauty of what we’re doing out here. If you’re an Arsenal fan right now, you’re living in a special moment, and you know it. So who cares about the ‘is football boring’ headline nonsense. It’s boring because Arsenal are brilliant. People are upset because we’re having a good time. You’re having a good time because you deserve it. This my friends, is gonna be our moment, our year, and we are going to be unbearable.

Arteta was raised in an Arsenal team that lacked tactical nous, power, and the stomach to be bullies. This Arsenal team is brutal, beautiful, smart, aggressive, and ready for any fight, at any place, at any time.

This feels like our year. That game was a big moment. Our momentum starts now.

Now get on that On The Whistle. x

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