Seven seasons and Mikel has been a busy boy.
“Some managers inherit a squad. I inherited a crime scene and only Starboy survived the investigations.”
(Source, Mikel Arteta (honestly))
IMG 1003
IMG 1003
Goalkeepers
Bernd Leno – the guy who made a world-class save look routine and a routine backpass look like a near-death experience.
Emiliano Martínez – still as arrogant as ever, perfectly suited at Chelsea.
Matt Macey – I checked and a reverse google search confirmed ‘yes, that is Matt Macey in the photo.’
Defenders
Héctor Bellerín – the man, the legend, the mullet
Kieran Tierney – his heart was always in the right place, shame the rest of him was always in the treatment room
Sokratis – sounded like a Brazilian footballer but played like a Greek philosopher
Rob Holding – once got named in Garth Crooks’ Team of the Week
Shkodran Mustafi – didn’t need instructions to mark the striker. Just a compass and someone to tell him where the striker actually was.
Calum Chambers – Not to be confused with the Australian rules footballer Callum Chambers
David Luiz – Well he had great hair
Sead Kolašinac – well he was better than Andre Santos
Midfielders
Dani Ceballos – looked great on YouTube
Mesut Özil – Turned up for Real Madrid in a friendly, disappeared against Wigan in the rain
Lucas Torreira – The little Uruguayan who bit ankles for fun
Ainsley Maitland-Niles – Winger, midfielder, right back, left back in the changing room
Joe Willock – Box-to-box energy, final-third amnesia
Mattéo Guendouzi – Well he had great hair, just not as great as David Luiz
Granit Xhaka – Two-footed in the best and worst ways possible
Emile Smith Rowe – The Croydon De Bruyne, when his hamstrings allowed it
Forwards
Alexandre Lacazette – Lyon to Arsenal for £52 million. Arsenal to Lyon for £0 million
Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang – unfortunately never learnt that you ‘play for the name in the front of shirt, not the one on the back
Reiss Nelson – there will always be Bournemouth
Gabriel Martinelli – Wrightys’ right, should have been treated better
Nicolas Pépé – 72 million quid no one is getting back
Bukayo Saka – Last man standing