A LITTLE bit of Mikel Arteta must die inside every time the clip goes around.
There may not have been a jet black hair out of place but, leading up to Christmas, the Arsenal boss was feeling the heat.
Successive draws against Fulham and Everton left Liverpool but a dot in the distance at the top of the Premier League; another campaign destined to end in what-might-have-beens and where-do-we-go-from-heres.
The Talksport phone lines were hotting up too with familiar questions about why he hadn’t signed a pwopah numba noiine.
Arteta’s set piece coach was getting more air-time than him. With the entire team loading up goal lines at every corner, the Gunners were derided as little more than a Stoke tribute act.
But the Spaniard blotted his copybook by going where no self-respecting manager should ever go when his trophy haul - a sole FA Cup in five years at the helm - was raised.
“The Charity Shield as well twice, no?”
No.
Because the Community Shield, as it is now called, is a day out for supporters to get a look at new signings, and to pay for the privilege of watching the winding down of a heavy pre-season between two sets of players who could not care less because the actual stuff that matters is just around the corner.
The Community Shield can never be used as a reference point for anything – just as winning a League final matters very little in the grand scheme of things.
How League finals avoided a cull, in the advent of the split season and a significantly compacted inter-county calendar, remains once of Gaelic football’s great mysteries.
But, with Groundhog Day upon us once more, Jim McGuinness fanned the flames last weekend by offering a window into where the League finals ranks for counties with Championship on the horizon.
His Donegal side currently sit second behind Galway in Division One and, with two games left to go, are well placed to claim a spot in the League final on March 29 – should they want to.
Which, of course, they don’t, because it comes eight days before the Tir Chonaill’s Ulster preliminary round clash against north-west neighbours Derry.
“Maybe 50 per cent of the cohort \[of Division One teams\] don’t really want to be in the League final, and I think that does diminish the competition.
“We will not be thinking about the League final, we’ll be thinking about what’s right for us – and if that means going into the League final that will be a consideration when we make those decisions.
“Managers shouldn’t be put in a position where they’re ‘playing games’ – and families going to the games shouldn’t be put in that position as well. This is all a conversation now.
“All I can say is, from our point of view, we will do what’s right for our players.”
Arsenal boss Mikel Arteta referred to two Community Shield wins when defending his trophy haul since becoming Gunners manager in 2019. Picture by PA (Peter Lous/PA)
Of course, Tir Chonaill’s priorities are wildly different than 12 months ago. Then, promotion to Division One was a must, and a feat they accomplished with the minimum of fuss.
But when it came to the Division Two decider - against future Ulster final opponents and eventual All-Ireland champions Armagh – their gaze had long been turned to Mickey Harte’s Derry weeks down the line.
“Sorry, we’re going into the f\*\*king Derry game a bit,” said former Donegal forward Brendan Devenney 15 minutes into a chat about the Orchard last March, before laughing, “hey, we’re disrespecting the League final here...”
The pedestrian pace as McGuinness’s men claimed a one-point win would likely be replicated should they find themselves in another ‘showpiece’ decider in just over three weeks’ time.
Claiming a national title of any kind might matter more to counties who are less frequent visitors to Croke Park, but is that argument enough for League finals to retain their place in an already crammed calendar?
Financial gain is a consideration too but, as a sporting occasion, and sporting fixtures, the incentive is minimal for all parties.
McGuinness refers to the potential diminishing of the competition but, in truth, the football Leagues have never been so strong. Crowds are up, fitness is up, quality is up; it is a lily that does not need to be gilded.
With an important link to Championship – particularly those bidding to escape/avoid the Tailteann Cup – it’s significance has never been greater in terms of preparation for what lies ahead; reaching and remaining in Division One a key objective of any campaign for those eyeing the biggest prize down the line.
It was even more senseless under the previous incarnation of the National Hurling League when, below Division One, promotion spots were decided in a one-off final.
Take Down’s 2022 campaign as an example. Fresh up from Division 2B for the first time in a decade, the Ardsmen beat Carlow and Kerry in Ballycran, and Westmeath in Mullingar, on the way to finishing top of 2A.
As with any League format, finishing top should always be enough to either be crowned champions, or earn promotion. Instead, Down were well beaten by Westmeath in the 2A final at Semple Stadium, and only now look destined for a deserved crack at the big boys above.
Should the Ardsmen finish in the top two this year, they will go straight up, irrespective of the result of the Division Two final.
Ultimately, the end should have to justify the means – now, more than ever, that is simply not the case.