"Where would we be without him?" a composed Manchester United staff member asked. Maybe they had restrained themselves out of sheer surprise at Bruno Fernandes' goal.
[United's](https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/all-about/manchester-united-fc) only effort on target in the first half came in the second minute of added time. For the second month running, Fernandes bent it like Beckham.
Fernandes is resembling Beckham's idol, Bryan Robson; the talismanic captain in an underachieving United team. He is certain to keep the Sir Matt Busby Player of the Year statue after this season. Only Cristiano Ronaldo and David de Gea's names are etched onto it four times and a fourth is in the offing for Fernandes.
Before his conversion at Goodison Park two weeks ago, Fernandes had not scored a direct Premier League free-kick in 48 attempts. Fernandes had the benefit of staring down David Raya, a goalkeeper better with his feet than his hands.
Raya was having such a serene afternoon his gloves seemed certain to be kept clean at its conclusion. They were still unmuddied after Fernandes' saveable free kick but the Spaniard saved superbly with his legs from Noussair Mazraoui and Fernandes.
Even the worst United side in 51 years has the flicker of a fear factor. Arsenal ordered United to attack the Stretford End in the first half. Fernandes jubilantly charged towards its denizens.
Roy Keane was in attendance to see Fernandes' effect in the flesh. Had Fernandes known Keane was watching from above the other corner of the Stretford End, maybe he would have headed in that direction.
It was Fernandes who put United 1-0 up at Arsenal in January, who instigated the fightback at Everton, created all three goals against Ipswich Town and kept them in the FA Cup a little longer. That is indubitably captain material.
In the early knockings, Matthijs de Ligt and Casemiro tackled each other inside the United area, with the loose ball just about trickling into Andre Onana's path. Their reaction was not to have a barney, square up to each other or eff and blind, but to high five.
Fernandes, typically, hit the right note with a whinge at Diogo Dalot during a stoppage after the right back's risk-aversive pass back to Leny Yoro. Fernandes had taken some questionable risks and misused the ball but the ends justified the means. He has the desired mentality. Casemiro consoled him at full-time as Fernandes stewed over his added-time chance.
There was Fernandes again, in the 55th minute, sprinting back to halt an Arsenal breakaway. The crowd was already buoyed by a quick and slick counter-attack brimming with wing play that United have been famed for. Dalot's clipped cross was met by Mazraoui but Raya's foot deviated the ball wide of the goal.
The first 15 minutes of the restart were maybe United's most uplifting of the season. Joshua Zirkzee casually converted in San Sebastian and tried to again when, had he gathered the ball, he would have turned to see the goal vacant.
United players' efforts amplified the atmosphere, apathetic for 47 minutes. United had been passive and pessimistic. Fernandes' dead-ball kick saw them come alive. Christian Eriksen, the oldest man on the pitch, was pressing as late as the 73rd minute.
That made it all the more galling for United when Declan Rice equalised in the 74th minute. Rice had been left unattended for an earlier corner that United failed to close him down from and he hit the ball into the Stretford End. Then it happened again from open play and the outcome was much different.
Rice was keen to rub it in the Stretford Enders' faces. He was given a caustic send-off at full-time.
The United assistant coach Carlos Fernandes had called Toby Collyer and Rasmus Hojlund's names just as Rice connected with Jurrien Timber's pull-back. The substitutes' introductions were sped-up once the scoreboard changed.
Hojlund, dropped after 19 goalless games, had two chances to win it. He was too slow with the first and thwarted by Gabriel Magalhaes the second time. Hojlund beat the ground. United did not beat Arsenal.
This game came close to being bracketed with the Da Silvas in midfield, Paddy McNair and Tyler Blackett in a back three and Marcus Rashford's Premier League debut as another of United's inconceivable wins against Arsenal. Fernandes possibly should have won it in the 93rd minute.
United have still not lost a home league match that they have led at half-time since 1984. Arsenal scored seven against the fodder of the Eredivisie (another reason not to plunder the talent from that league in the transfer market) in midweek and regressed to the also-rans that they are.
Around 5,000 United supporters joined the protest against the Glazer family outside the stadium. Inside, there was a whiff of cordite from the flares that had been let off. The shutters came down in the Munich Tunnel but went back up. As kick-off loomed, the protesters dispersed.
The anti-Glazer chants began with the players in the tunnel and Sir Jim Ratcliffe standing in the directors' box. The first rendition of 'Stand up if you hate Glazers' came in the sixth minute.
They sang 'Joel Glazer's gonna die' when it was his brother, Edward (not recognised by the broadcasters), who was sat in front of Ratcliffe. Joel has not been to Old Trafford in almost six years.
Also nearby were Sir Alex Ferguson and David Gill, staunch defenders of the Glazers. Ferguson described the Glazers as "wonderful owners" and Gill shamelessly dismissed his pre-takeover quote that "debt is the road to ruin".
In an anodyne first half, Ruben Amorim was so appalled by one passage of play he leaned so far back he had to steady himself to avoid the prospect of toppling over. That was as bad as it got.
He too may wonder where United would be without Fernandes.