Where is ubuntu when officials arrive in style at grieving families and leave them with empty hands? What’s the point of these visits? Considering that by the time they visit these families, they would have announced that they have dispatched psycho-social teams to the schools or families? Beyond this, what are they offering these families? Who among them thought this was a brilliant idea worth repeating?
I ask because in one of the homes we tagged along to, there was an enamel dish on the table for “_matshidiso_” and there was only one monetary note pledged in it — in a room full of officials. No shame, just vibes. Of course, families do not put the dish out for hand-outs, but it is expected that out of courtesy one leaves a coin or note to cement the shared loss.
I asked the mother, Shelly Rapolai, the mother of the late [Kgosi Malatji](https://www.timeslive.co.za/news/south-africa/2025-03-11-he-was-a-very-sweet-boy-tributes-pour-in-for-pupils-killed-in-scholar-transport-crash/), how the government officials had assisted them. She sighed and essentially said all they did was say sorry and left.
Sadly this is the _modus operandi_ of this department in Gauteng. We have seen it before. Like clockwork, when a learner dies in an accident, commits suicide, is poisoned, wiped out in a storm or reduced to ash by shack fires, the officials descend on that family or “rush to the scene”.
At some point, this showmanship "_veza ubuso_" \[show face\] behaviour needs to stop. This rude act where families are subjected to performing, articulating and explaining their pain and trauma while journalists snap away at the wailing mother, a father who is in disbelief and a confused sibling while everyone nods solemnly, needs to stop. Leaders, it seems, no longer attend to the community to help but are there simply to seem as though they are helping.
The cycle is cruel. They learn of a tragedy, there is the outrage, a visit, promises — and then silence. Meanwhile, the families are left in grief, with no closure, help or solution. The people who remain are the community, who will help them clean the pots and pack the many chairs and tables.
I’m in no way advocating for no appearances from officials. I’m simply challenging their intentions — and equally the purported impact of their photo ops at the cost of grieving families. I also recognise that ours is to report the stories, out of duty and care. Someone has to document the truth. But when will citizen’s pain and grief stop being used as a political tool? How far removed are politicians from reality that they think it's OK to use death — worse, of children — as an opportunity to pretend to be working?
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