Sandro Mamukelashvili is the man of the hour. And why wouldn’t he be? Dude absolutely wrecked all analytics as we know it. If you googled PER, you would see a picture of John Hollinger holding a picture of Sandro Mamukelashvili.
Mamukelashvili led all players with 34 points on an incredulous 13 for 14 shooting with 9 rebounds. Stefan Castle continued his late season surge with 22 points, while Devin Vassell showed off new defensive skills with 4 blocks.
It cannot be overstated how crazy Mamukelashvili’s stat line stood out last night. Not only did he do all of this from the bench, but he basically averaged 1.7 points per minute. You cannot replicate this on a video game. You could put it on easy mode while your opponent could be busy eating hot pockets and just let you score at will and you would still not be as efficient as Mamukelashvili was on Tuesday night.
Mamukelashvili was so mathematically improbable that the clock around Flavor Flav’s neck started to run quantum physics equations just to bring balance to the universe.
In a season full of unfortunate injuries and bad luck, Stefon Castle’s rookie campaign is a bright spot and should make Spurs fans excited for next season as he continues to grow. Generally, everyone had high expectations for the number four overall pick, but not many would expect Castle to be this good, or that his game would be this mature.
Stephon Castle has 20 games with 20+ points this season
NO other rookie has more than 8 such games
6 of Steph’s 20 20-point games have come in March & he’s heating up at the right time with averages of 20.6-4.3-4.1 this month
ROTY Frontrunner?pic.twitter.com/o0SE26Jrtx
— Point Made Basketball (@pointmadebball) March 20, 2025
Let’s not stop heaping praise on Mamukelashvili. This was a pretty pass to Jeremy Sochan for the easy bucket. Maybe if Mamukelashvili wasn’t so “selfish” he could’ve had more assists on top of the 3 dimes that he dished out in those 19 minutes.
Castle sliced his way through the defense like a hot knife through cold butter. Why cold butter? Because who really has the foresight to remember to get the butter out of the fridge before cooking something.
The bank is open on Tuesdays, especially for Harrison Barnes, but the drive-through hasn’t been open for five years. I’m not sure why but I miss doing my banking from my car where I send a stack of 2 dollar bills through the delivery tube and give myself unfathomable anxiety wondering if the teller is going to miscount the amount.
Ten years from now, Netflix will have a documentary about this night, and it will be revealed that Flavor Flav and Sandro Mamukelashvili ended up in a “Freaky Friday” situation plus a “Space Jam” talent acquisition situation where Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, Tim Duncan, and Arvydas Sabonis all inhabited one corporeal body and dominated for 19 minutes. On an unrelated note, does anyone know any executive producers looking for a script for “Space Jam 3: Sandro and Flavor Flav Rescue the Riverwalk”?
Chris Paul and Flavor Flav are leaving Frost Bank Center now — Flav has himself a Sandro Mamukelashvili jersey on.
Sandro said the rapper made the trek out here for his own birthday. Texted him a few days ago. #PorVida pic.twitter.com/1dLiA4LDe3
— Matt Guzman (@mattgzman) March 20, 2025
If you missed the game because you were too busy extrapolating what 34 points in 19 minutes would be over a full 48 minutes, here are the full-game highlights:
Next up, the Spurs host the Philadelphia 76ers on Friday, March 21, 2025.