Brandon Williams wearing a red Manchester United shirtGetty Images
Former Manchester United defender Brandon Williams says it "hurts watching football" after being without a club since last summer.
Williams was released by boyhood team Manchester United at the end of the 2023-24 season after his contract expired and has spent this campaign watching the game from the outside.
The 24-year-old's last appearance came in December 2023 during a loan spell with Ipswich.
In March, Williams admitted to a charge of dangerous driving - he had been caught in August 2023 doing almost 100mph before crashing his car in Cheshire.
"I go into this mode where I just don't care," Williams said on Ben Foster's Fozcast podcast.
"I have this switch where I don't care what happens. They [family and friends] wanted me to get back to football but they could see I'd fallen out of love with.
"It hurts me watching football now because I just want to be there, I just want to play. I miss being in a team, on the coach, travelling to games, having meals together and just doing things."
Williams came through Manchester United's academy to make his senior debut under Ole Gunnar Solskjaer in 2019.
The left-back made 51 appearances, including two in the Champions League, but struggled to tie down a regular spot and spent time on loan at Norwich and Ipswich.
He featured under Kieran McKenna at Ipswich but the former Manchester United coach sent Williams back to his parent club after seeing that "something wasn't right".
"I had a few problems going on off the pitch at the end of the year," Williams said.
"He [McKenna] said 'get yourself sorted and come back as Brandon'.
"When I did come back to Manchester, things increased off the pitch with family problems and friend problems."
Williams will be sentenced for his dangerous driving charge on 9 May at Chester Crown Court.
He was caught driving in an erratic manner and at up to 99mph in a 70mph zone. In March, the court heard he was seen with a balloon at his mouth.
The CPS said a female passenger was seen filming them at one point on her phone, adding that it was clear to witnesses that Williams' Audi was out of control before colliding with another car.
Williams was breathalysed but the test was negative.
Williams raring to go after 'reset'
Williams is seeking a route back into the game but admitted that he found it difficult to deal with being in the spotlight since breaking into the first team at Old Trafford.
He met with Mick Farrell, a psychologist at Manchester United, but feared opening up completely on his struggles in case word spread around the club and he received an unsympathetic response.
Williams said he was going through some "dark" times and Farrell would come to visit in the morning to try to get him to leave his apartment.
The England under-21 international believes his time away from the game has afforded him the opportunity to "reset" and feels he is ready to get back playing again next season.
"I want to have that feeling again of winning and being around the changing room environment," Williams said.
"I've had loads of teams trying to get me out - America, Europe and England - but I haven't been ready. I want to go somewhere 100% focused and kick on.
"I would like to experience that different culture. I'm only 24 so I could do three or four years abroad. Definitely Europe at a good club or an upcoming club."
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