BRENT A GOB: This week, Harry's blasting off about Hugo Ekitike's goal celebration, Scott McTominay's Ballon d'Or nomination and Sir Jim Ratcliffe's selective austerity
10:27, 14 Aug 2025
Harry Brent
Harry Brent is a journalist, broadcaster and columnist who joined Reach PLC in 2021. He specialises in football and opinion writing and is the voice of the Daily Star's unmissable weekly 'Brent A Gob' column. Previously, Harry worked for GiveMeSport and The Irish Post.
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Our man Harry Brent is not happy in his latest column
I like the look of Hugo Ekitike, but his Community Shield goal celebration had some serious James Corden energy – it was awkward and absolutely reeked of insecurity.
He stuck his hands up and made a 'yap, yap, yap' gesture, as if he'd just silenced his critics – who, for my money, are about as non-existent as Steven Gerrard's Premier League winners' medal.
Who exactly is he shutting up? The folks tipping him to win the Golden Ball? The fans comparing him to Alexander Isak and Viktor Gyokeres?
He's been in England for less time than Donald Trump's been on a treadmill. The fact that he's already rattled by criticism – imaginary or otherwise – makes him look like a self-absorbed, mentally-brittle dweeb; the lovechild of Naomi Osaka and Kanye West.
I get it, he's been Liverpudlianised – which means he'll now take criticism like a vegan takes bacon at a breakfast buffet. But far too many modern footballers are like this: thin-skinned and desperate to win arguments nobody's having with them.
Here's an idea, lads: log off social media, stop taking everything – including yourselves – so bloody seriously, and if you really must silence your critics, do it with your boots – not with the antics of a 14-year-old having a meltdown on Facebook.
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Hugo Ekitike celebrating his goal in the Community Shield
Hugo Ekitike's goal celebration made him look a little thin-skinned(Image: Getty Images)
You've Scott to be kidding me
Scott McTominay has been nominated for the Ballon d'Or. That might be the silliest sentence I've ever written as a journalist – narrowly edging out "Manchester United have paid £80million for Harry Maguire."
Don't get me wrong, I watched a fair bit of Napoli last season – and like a dodgy kebab at 3am, McTominay was inexplicably effective.
But come on – it's Scott Mc-bloody-Tominay… and it's the Ballon bloody-d'Or! I haven't seen such a bizarre mix of mediocrity and prestige since Sadiq Khan received a Knighthood.
An edited photo of Scott McTominay lifting the Ballon d'Or trophy
Scott McTominay could win the Ballon d'Or... what a world
He's not even the only also-ran in there. Denzel Dumfries and Alexis Mac Allister made the list too – giving off bigger 'no-hoper' vibes than I did that time I slid into Margot Robbie's DMs. Just like Kyle Walker when he's tracking runners, the Ballon d'Or has completely lost its way.
It used to be about recognising and rewarding individual brilliance. But now, shortlisted players are just plucked arbitrarily from the best-performing teams – you know, like Chelsea's transfer policy.
Of the 30 nominees this year, only three failed to win silverware last season, and over three-quarters either won their domestic league or played in the Champions League final.
Look, fair play to McTominay. I'm happy for the lad. But as Boris Johnson proved, half-successful plodders should never be handed top honours or prestigious nods.
Rags-to-Riches Ratcliffe
Manchester United owner Sir Jim Ratcliffe
Sir Jim Ratcliffe could spend over £300m this summer after moaning for months about Man Utd being in financial peril(Image: UEFA via Getty Images)
Sir Jim Ratcliffe's got some bloody nerve, hasn't he? For the past year, he's been stomping around Old Trafford like some tweed-jacketed doomsday prophet wearing a prawn sandwich board, muttering about looming financial oblivion.
Tea ladies have been sacked, office biscuits have been rationed, and he's probably been following cleaners around Carrington flicking light switches off – "That's 0.3p saved, Doris. And no, you can't boil the kettle again."
And yet, after penny-pinching and scaremongering like a bargain-bin horror director, he spunks £200m on three new players – and now has his eye on Brighton's Carlos Baleba for another £100m, all while bringing in as much from player sales as Paul Scholes has brain cells: bugger all!
New Manchester United signings Bryan Mbeumo, Benjamin Sesko & Matheus Cunha pose together with team shirts
Manchester United's new-look front line: Bryan Mbeumo, Benjamin Sesko and Matheus Cuhnha(Image: Ash Donelon/Manchester United via Getty Images)
You can't spend 12 months playing the tight-fisted dad who "has to make unpopular decisions", then go on a vanity spree worthy of the Kardashians.
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That'd be like Labour constantly moaning about inheriting a £22billion black hole, then merrily blowing twice that amount to pointlessly offload the Chagos Islands – an absurd hypothetical, of course. Imagine a world like that.