When Alexander Isak is trending and you’re not based in Liverpool or Newcastle, just make up some nonsense…
Arsenal hijack ahoy
Ten days after the most egregious nonsense from football.london that suggested that Tottenham would ‘surely get the deal done’ if they offered £125m for Alexander Isak, comes this from the same outlet:
Arsenal can hijack Alexander Isak to Liverpool transfer with Mikel Arteta’s £186m secret weapon
It’s genuinely f***ing mental.
Immediately, you’re thinking ‘no they can’t’, ‘do they actually want to?’ and again ‘no they can’t’, all within about 0.3 seconds of reading the most opportunistic of headlines.
What do you do when you’re the publisher of a London football title and Alexander Isak (a Newcastle player trying to move to Liverpool) is the trending topic? You just think ‘f*** it’ and churn out absolute bollocks, it seems.
On Wednesday night, as news of Kai Havertz’ injury broke:
Arsenal already have dream Alexander Isak masterplan as Kai Havertz injury sparks transfer need
It seems odd that Arsenal did not attempt to realise this ‘dream Alexander Isak masterplan’ before Havertz got injured. And odder still that anybody would think that the solution to losing your second-choice striker is to break the actual British transfer record to sign the most coveted striker in world football.
It’s almost like it’s utter nonsense.
And now – on Thursday – we are told that ‘Arsenal can hijack Alexander Isak to Liverpool transfer’. How? Why? How? What?
Well because ‘Arsenal have a secret weapon in the race to sign Alexander Isak’. Is it a ‘race’? It doesn’t feel like a ‘race’; at this point it’s just a ‘fight’ between Isak and Newcastle United.
football.london understands that the Gunners were – once – interested in signing Isak, but he was deemed simply too expensive.
Thankfully his price has now dropped to…no, his price has not dropped at all. But do you know what has dropped? Arsenal’s spending capacity as the purchase of Eberechi Eze will take their summer spend past £250m.
But are we in danger of underestimating the ‘secret weapon’ have in their favour in the ‘race’ (not a race) to sign a player a) they can’t afford and b) does not want to join Arsenal?
If Mikel Arteta really wanted to snatch Isak from under Arne Slot’s nose, then he could ask Martin Odegaard, Mikel Merino, Martin Zubimendi to put in a good word. The trio, who cost Arsenal a combined £122m, played with Isak at Real Sociedad.
We were not underestimating Arsenal’s ‘secret weapon’.
So to re-cap: Arsenal could hijack Liverpool’s move for Alexander Isak by asking three of their players to tell him how absolutely bloody lovely it is at Arsenal? Could they also sweet-talk him into persuading Newcastle to sell him for about £60m?
But that doesn’t make a ‘£186m secret weapon’…
Gyokeres could also put in a good word.
Swedish, you see. It’s basically nailed on.
READ: ‘Dirty’ Liverpool? No… Newcastle, Isak, his agent, Saudis, the media all cop the blame
Chronic wind
So what are Alexander Isak’s options if Liverpool do not bid again? Over to the Newcastle Evening Chronicle:
Real Madrid offer, Arsenal wildcard – Alexander Isak transfer lifelines if Liverpool change stance
Why stop there? Let’s go ‘Man Utd wildcard’. In for a penny…
Don’t look back in angerWe can hardly blame a Newcastle website for publishing 18 stories in 24 hours about Alexander Isak, but maybe it could have been 17. Did they need to do this?
Joelinton ‘anger’ at Alexander Isak spotted ahead of Newcastle United & Liverpool clash
The ‘anger’ in quote marks is just the Chronicle quoting themselves, suggesting that a Joelinton ‘like’ (while stressing that ‘likes are not endorsements of statements’) on a Newcastle fan post ‘does suggest Joelinton’s anger and frustration at the situation and support for the fans heading into Monday night’s encounter’.
What’s £10m between friends?
There’s some considerable juice to be squeezed from the story of how Arsenal signed Eberechi Eze, seemingly from under the noses of Tottenham, but Mediawatch cannot help but think some are losing sight of the salient details.
Over to the Mirror, who claim Spurs have been ’embarrassed’ by *checks notes* losing out on an Arsenal fan to Arsenal…
Daniel Levy had thrashed out a deal worth £50m plus £10m in add-ons, while Arsenal will pay £60m and £7.5m in add-ons. Steve Parish’s relationship with Arsenal executive vice-chairman Tim Lewis moved the Gunners to the front of the queue over recent days.
Pretty sure that extra £10m is what ‘moved the Gunners to the front of the queue over recent days’, fellas. Not sure that Lewis and Parish being WhatsApp buddies – ‘the pair are in regular communication’ – is what greased those particular wheels.
Obviously there’s another very good reason why Eze would choose Arsenal over Spurs, as evidenced by the never-knowingly-undersold Mirror:
Mikel Arteta can give Eberechi Eze dream start to life at Arsenal with one simple gesture
It’s the shirt, guys. It’s always the shirt.
READ: Eze does it perfectly compared to Alexander Isak and his strikingly bad behaviour