ARSENAL COMPETE LIKE A BIG DAWG CLUB
Are Arsenal sick in the head? They want 8 players? In one window? £300m spent? £14.78 and a packet of Prawn Cocktail Golden Wonder crisps in return?
This is not who the people thought we were… this is… ambition? Aggression? The rolling of the dice. This is a new world and I’m not sure I’m ready for it.
Piero Hincapié, for 60m euros, is absolutely crazy times. He’s primarily a centre back for Leverkusen, but he does dance out on the left. At 6ft, he’s a little small to be a real solution for Arsenal in a team of giants, but who knows, he might have the giant leap of Thomas Vermaelen.
I’m mostly interested in this player because he looks very fast and he has the ability to move on the overlap to get into dangerous positions. He looks more Ben White in his comps than he does Myles Lewis-Skelly. He’s also decent from set pieces. He reeks of Tomiyasu optionality.
Arsenal were looking at overlapping left-backs to support Eze’s desire to tuck inside as a left-sided attacker (Nasri-like). Is this the guy? I’m not sure. But he looks like a fabulous option that is going to be additive to a defensive line that is slowly shoving aside players who aren’t robust. This guy dropped 3,700 minutes for Leverkusen in a relentless setup championed by the now Real Madrid manager. I didn’t pay attention to him, nor did you, but one would imagine if he’s come out of a system built by Simon Rolfes, he’s probably quite good.
Oh, you knew about him? Sure buddy. Sure you did.
I’m now looking at the squad, seeing Gabriel Jesus coming back into contention, and wondering where there’s a weakness. Am I totally sold on all 8 players? No. But am I sold on all 8 players collectively making us far stronger than we were last season? Absolutely. Bukayo Saka is out for 3–4 weeks and I’m not crying into my laptop like a giant man baby. I think Madueke and Max Dowman are going to offer Arsenal a genuine threat. Am I concerned about the left-hand side? Trossard, Martinelli, AND Eze. No, I’mbuzzing about that side of the pitch. Ethan and Odegaard through the middle feels pretty, pretty good.
The only future area of surgery is to find a better young midfielder to ask questions of Zubimendi and Declan Rice. Norgaard is a stopgap, but he’s already showing the drawbacks of trying to make a 31-year-old work in a setup with his injury. We need a 24-year-old chomping at the bit and it’s just a shame we couldn’t find one this summer so they could get a year to bed in under better players. But come on… is that really a moan? No it’s not, so I’ll shut my damn face before one of you tells me to.
Viktor Gyökeres is putting in the hard hours, but not getting much in return. This beast is a hard runner, but also finds himself isolated, alone, and sad most of the time. Look at these two graphs fromSky Sports.
He’s the second most isolated striker in the league. That’s basically how I felt when no one would believe me that we didn’t pay £48.5m for Madueke, so I get him, I connect.
But this is a job that can be solved. We have a lot of players not used to playing for a greedy pig striker who always shows for the ball. There is also an element we have to admit… his first touch is like a toddler with a paintbrush. I’m sure that is factoring into some of the thinking. He’s about as refined as a Friday night kebab on Holloway Road. That said, he is what he is, and he scores goals. We need to be finding him in the box with cut-backs, crosses, and balls in behind. We need to give it a go, because he showed what he can do when given a direct run at the weekend… he’s a brute, a thug… pure civil disobedience when put in the right positions. Arsenal need to unlock this heathen.
Liverpool vs Newcastle… may I speak?
Arne Slot’s team looks like they have not spent well in defence so far. Kerkez was bullied by Newcastle and should hang his head in shame for that Bruno goal. Konate looks like his head is well and truly in Madrid. Eddie Howe’s 10 men asked serious questions of Liverpool and this isn’t the first time this season they’ve looked vulnerable. A title defence is ALWAYS tough and it looks like this season is going to be less blessed for Slot. I mean, he’s still blessed enough to catch Newcastle when Isak is off striker, and still blessed enough to play Newcastle with 10 men for 55 minutes, and still blessed to get a last-minute goal. But a little less blessed than last season.
I’m not gonna lie here, I think Arsenal can get at their full backs, we can bully Konate and a less powerful VVD, and we can cause havoc from set pieces at the weekend… even without Bukayo.
If we get more than a point at Anfield, that will make for a spectacular start indeed.
Ok, that’s me done for today. Jacob Hawley is recording the first of a new series where he meets people funnier than me to talk about football. The first episode drops as an early bird for members TODAY. So keep your eyes peeled. Johnny’s ratings continue, he put one out yesterday, that’s a members exclusive, then we’ll have Therapy and a Before the Whistle for you before Friday. This Le Grove Media LLC is basically Netflix for Arsenal opinion, but super low budget.
Get on the subscription… advert free, early birds, exclusive LIVE content, Q&As, Discord channel, and access to all primo writing AND… I have the old website up and running, so if you’re a Le Grove sicko, you’ll be able to look at all the old posts and dredge up commentary that could get me cancelled.
That’s me done… see you in the comments. x