Heard the one about Sesko, Ryanair and Roy?
Benjamin Sesko scored a very fine equaliser for Manchester United against West Ham last week, but Roy Keane was having none of the swooning from his colleague on The Overlap. Surely only Keane, though, could produce a Ryanair analogy for the occasion.
“It was a nice finish. But sorry, isn’t that what he’s supposed to do? Man United and their expectations,” he said with a roll of the eyes. “It’s like Ryanair. If a flight is on time, everyone is cheering. But usually you’re going to be two hours late and everyone thinks that’s the norm.
“I flew with Ryanair on Sunday and it was two hours late. Nobody was even arguing because this is what we expect. You have low expectations. With Ryanair, you know when you land and they play the music because it was on time? That’s Sesko and United. That’s what you’re supposed to do.”
In other words, Ryanair and Benjamin? Do your job.
Word of Mouth
“It’s a club I love and I know a lot about it having spent many years there in different capacities. It needs someone to give the club a lift, whether that is me or whoever they decide to bring in.” — Tim Sherwood issues a come-and-get-me plea to Spurs afterThomas Frank’s sacking.
“Would I fancy it? Of course I would, without any shadow of a doubt. But I am a realist – I don’t live in cuckoo land. It is very doubtful if I would get the job. But yeah, of course I could do the job.” — Harry Redknapp issues a come-and-get-me plea to Spurs after Thomas Frank’s sacking.
Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola acknowledges the fans following his team's 2-0 victory against Salford City in the FA Cup fourth round at the Etihad Stadium on Saturday. Photograph: Nick Potts/PA Wire
Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola acknowledges the fans following his team's 2-0 victory against Salford City in the FA Cup fourth round at the Etihad Stadium on Saturday. Photograph: Nick Potts/PA Wire
“One of the most enjoyable memories that I will have from this country is when I play FA Cup away at League One or League Two clubs. That experience when you arrive at the stadium and all the fans sing ‘who are ya?! who are ya?!’. This kind of vibe along with the long balls.” — Pep Guardiola on the, eh, magic of the FA Cup.
In words
“Parrott brought it all back, all the wonderful times. Please God it will continue.” — Charlie O’Leary, the now 102-year-old former kitman for Jack Charlton, telling RTÉ how Troy is reminding him of the good old days.
In numbers
4 — That’s the record number of permanent managers Nottingham Forest have had this season — Nuno Espirito Santo, Ange Postecoglou, Sean Dyche and now Vitor Pereira. Unstable might be the word.
Ronaldo told to wind his neck in
After going off in a huff and missing three games for Al-Nassr, him being highly disgruntled with how the club is being run, Cristiano Ronaldo made a scoring return on Saturday in their 2-0 win over Al-Fateh.
It would be fair to say, though, that not everyone in the country has been overly impressed by his behaviour, not least because he’s getting paid over €200 million a year. Like sports broadcaster Walid Al-Faraj.
“Cristiano Ronaldo needs to know his place,” said Al-Faraj. “This country is called Saudi Arabia, not Ronaldo’s Arabia. Not in 500 years would he ever have entered the White House [to meet Donald Trump] if he hadn’t been part of the Saudi delegation. He wouldn’t even have gotten close to the door.”
That’s Cristiano told.
Cristiano Ronaldo returned to action for Al-Nassr on Saturday, scoring the opening goal in their 2-0 victory against Al-Fateh. File photograph: Abdullah Ahmed/Getty Images
Cristiano Ronaldo returned to action for Al-Nassr on Saturday, scoring the opening goal in their 2-0 victory against Al-Fateh. File photograph: Abdullah Ahmed/Getty Images
More Word of Mouth
“Nottingham Forest Football Club can confirm that Sean Dyche has been relieved of his duties as head coach.” — The Premier League strugglers announce another sacking after midnight on February 12th.
“If Dyche goes today would anyone be surprised?” — Broadcaster Richard Keys has his say on social media approximately five hours after Dyche’s sacking.
“Hello?” — X users in response to Keys.
“I was telling myself after I scored the second, if this is another day where I score two goals only, I was going to kill myself. I wanted the hat-trick bad.” — Norwich striker Mohamed Toure a little too eager to score three against Oxford United – which, mercifully, he did.
“We are delighted to confirm that Martha Stewart, who has built a long and successful career as America’s leading homemaking and lifestyle expert, has followed Snoop Dogg and Luka Modric in becoming a minority owner of our football club.” — Swansea City announcing the latest member of the – surely? – oddest club ownership in history.