Brazil legend could have been more professional at Real Madrid
Considering he won league titles with Real Madrid, Bayern Munich and Palmeiras, the Champions League with Madrid, 84 caps for Brazil, with whom he was a World Cup runner-up, it’s fair to say that Zé Roberto had a pretty useful career. But when he spoke to Brazilian media last week, he admitted that he could have been, well, a touch more professional during his brief enough spell with Real Madrid.
“Video games disrupted me a lot. I was young, newly married, and I bought a PlayStation. I was like a rooster. We would hang out all day and night and play video games. I played until the early hours of the morning, I ate poorly, and I slept very little. I gained weight. I arrived at training with dark circles under my eyes.”
“It was the stress of trying to beat games like Crash Bandicoot. Then I got hungry at dawn. I ate a lot of cookies. Then came snacks and soda. I was getting overweight without realising it. And stressed because of Crash Bandicoot.”
It’s a wonder he lasted as long as six months at the club.
Word of Mouth
“Modric was a slow-motion spectacle. He still makes the difference at 40, I hope he can play until he’s 60. I love him, he’s a fabulous player – but the Italian league is an undignified spectacle, a disgusting game.” – Antonio Cassano lovin’ Luka, but loathing the Milan derby.
“Is the glass half full or half empty? There’s nothing full here.” – Igor Tudor not sounding tremendously upbeat before Spurs’ trip to Anfield.
“All the stadiums are going to be packed, it’s going to be a total party! We’re facing something enormous. It’s more than a tournament, more than a sporting competition – it’s a social event that the world will stop to watch!” – Gianni ‘Comical Ali’ Infantino previewing this summer’s World Cup.
Fifa president Gianni Infantino. Photograph: David Salazar/AFP via Getty
Fifa president Gianni Infantino. Photograph: David Salazar/AFP via Getty
VAR causes controversy in Germany again
It was a controversy-free week for VAR. Kidding. First, we take you to Cologne where the stadium announcer, Michael Trippel, was severely peeved by several of the referee’s decisions after he viewed his VAR screen during Cologne’s 2-1 defeat to Borussia Dortmund.
Stadium announcers are forbidden from making their feelings know down their microphones, so did Michael keep his thoughts to himself? Did he heck. “Disgusting and repulsive,” he bellowed down said mic about one decision, and then lost the plot again through the loudspeakers when a late penalty wasn’t given to Cologne.
Meanwhile, in the German second division a “Pull the plug on VAR” banner was displayed by Preussen Munster fans during the game against Hertha Berlin. And that’s precisely what one of their fans did – when the ref went to check for a Hertha penalty on his screen, it was blank, the plug lying on the floor. Michael’s thinking, “hmm, there’s an idea”.
In words
“He will have to get Liverpool in to the top four – otherwise he’ll be the next Tottenham manager.” – Paul Merson predicting a bleak future for Arne Slot.
In numbers
16 years and 73 days – Max Dowman, now the youngest scorer in Premier League history, Arsenal using child labour in their quest for the title.
MORE WORD OF MOUTH
“It’s 17 years I’ve been managing in the Champions League, and every time I lose, boom, my God! Pew, pew, pew [mimics being shot]. I have been massacred.” – Pep Guardiola feeling a bit sorry for himself.
“It’s very complicated to be me, my goodness. I have to have a lot of patience to put up with you all.” – Neymar addressing his whiny fans on Instagram.
“He’s a menace on TV. He should stop doing punditry. Our team is the GOAT of the Premier League, don’t compare them to this Arsenal team. Walcott was probably drunk – if he wasn’t, then he’s a danger to society.” – Patric Evra not taking too kindly to Theo Walcott’s claim that the current Arsenal team are on a par with Manchester United’s 2008 Champions League-winning side.