You ever have those moments where you think like an old person, then realize that's because you're not young anymore? I was outside my house taking a picture of wild petunias that are growing in my plant pot, and I was thinking about downloading Instagram so I could post it under the caption of ‘sick petunias’, but then I thought better of it. Much more advisable to write it down to thousands of people so they all know I’m a plant loser.
Loser is exactly what I don’t want my Arsenal experience to be like this weekend. I think we were all a little shocked when Brighton battered us like a Scottish Mars bar in our last game of phase one of the season. It was a blip in context of the WONDERFUL run of winning, but it still stung. Like conceding a goal after walloping 5 goals. Just not a nice taste, all metallic, like putting one of those camera batteries in your mouth as a kid.
The injury news is a total joke, Mikel Arteta delivers more propaganda than North Korea. How can one possibly analyze any of these dryly delivered assessments? Kai, maybe? Timber, who knows? Konsa, sounds promising? Tzolis… can’t argue the fact we saw him blow out his hammy.
My guess is that it has finally landed with Mikel that he needs to let players tell him what their bodies can and cannot do. Hope in that previous statement is like the girlfriend who has been cheated on by her boyfriend in an industrial manner, telling you that he won’t cheat again. Arteta is always gonna be like, yeah, there’s just no way we’re gonna play Declan every game, then in 4 weeks’ time, he’ll be telling us that the new analysts submitted his DNA to the Pentagon because they think he might be a new form of life that does not get tired.
My suspicion is that Declan will make it, Timber will be available for a second half return, Ben White and Hincapie will be good, and it’ll be Gyokeres or Merino up front.
Speaking of the scoring sensation, Viktor… this is last chance saloon. Beating up international players and substandard defences in Europe is not going to save his career at Arsenal. If he drops another stinker where he doesn’t contribute to the performance, I fear he’s gonna get statement benched for Merino, and he’ll be moved out in the New Year. Merino is the better player, he’s more deadly, and he is more of a threat from a wider variety of positions… he also makes those around him better. That isn’t Viktor. Viktor scores goals, that’s it. But if he’s lost that confidence in the Premier League, or he’s been sussed… hard to see Arteta persisting when he had a dreamy option in Mikky Merino.
Leeds have been decent this season, but they have flattered to deceive. James Trafford has been in scintillating form and he’s kept quite a lot of xG out of the net. That will break at some point. Arsenal have scored a lot of goals against Leeds over the years. It wouldn’t shock me if there was a big day again tomorrow. Champions, doing ‘we’re back football’ would be the hope. But, we all know what happens when you hope in this league, the wet fish comes out of the monger’s bag, and takes your bald head down from a BMW Mini.
Above are some hot facts about Leeds powered by my robots if you care to indulge.
Ok, that’s my lot for today, see you on the Discord or in the comments. Sign up for a GOOD sub deal right now and be cool like those cats they talk about up town. BIG LOVE. Also, I know things are tight around the world, if you need Le Grove to make you feel sexy, you just email me and I’ll sort you. xxx
LEEDS (H) | ON THE WHISTLE | RESPONSE NEEDED | LIVE SHOW
It’s a BIG day for Arsenal as they welcome DIRTY Leeds from, err, Leeds.